Heaven. Pure heaven. Chalk full of turquois waters, a belly-up bar and muscle healing hot water, you have my happy place. The Blue Lagoon is a geothermal spa with seawater that does wonders for the skin as it soothes and relaxes. Many stop in to/from the main, Keflavik International Airport, which is closer (12 miles) than the capital, Reykjavik (24 miles). The lagoon is located smack in the middle of lava fields in the Reykjanes Peninsula. Literally, just lava fields all around. Disney can't say that.

It's a man-made lagoon fed by water from the nearby (and background noticeable) geothermal power plant, Svartsengi. Throughout the many hours in and out of the lagoon, you'll notice the passing steam clouds where the hundreds of other guests simply disappear. Ta da! The warm waters (approximately 98-102 degrees F) are full of silica and sulfur. The silicate minerals are the root cause of the water's milky blue shade. Buckets are located around the back side of the lagoon with vats of the stuff (silica) to apply to your face, neck, back and chest. It's a gooey communal facial. 

Packages vary according to price and amenities included. I booked the Premium package, the most popular of all the packages. It came with entrance, a towel, robe, flip-flops, sample products, a free drink from the pool bar and a two course 4-star lunch (where I could wear the robe). I had also heard about the floating massages, so I had them throw one of those in too. Cha-ching.

After a couple hours exploring the many parts of the lagoon, I met my masseuse in the far corner section. He applied oil to my back and then had me lay down on a floating mat with pillow. A "blanket" was put over me to keep me warm and every few minutes he would dunk my body to rewarm the blanket. It wasn't one of the best massages I've ever had but it was certainly the strangest. Both categories are awarded equal merit status. Once time was up (30 minutes) my masseuse tub-boated me to the corner "holding" area to relax on my floating mat until I decided to rejoin the others. (Just a minute or so before I felt like a floating weirdo).

Six hours from when I arrived, I had been properly soaked, fed, boozed and massaged. All it needed was the pearly gates.

What is a fish spa, you ask? I first witnessed it on the legendary series, "The Bachelor", Juan Pablo's season in Seoul, South Korea. The remaining ladies were taken there as part of a group date. It's basically an organic pedicure. Hundreds of tiny carp called the Garra rufa fish glom onto your feet and toes and nibble the dead skin. They don't have teeth, just magical powers. It's like a vibrating cheese grater with a poor power supply that gives continuous electric shocks. By tiny fish.

Before putting your feet into the fish tank you're asked to shower and apply an antibacterial spray. The one to three inch Garra rufas attack your feet as soon as you drop them in the water. Know to increase blood circulation and exfoliate skin, the Garra rufas are also referred to as "doctor fish". As they nibble off dead skin they leave an enzyme called Ditranol which makes the skin renew itself. Sessions last 20, 30 or 45 minutes depending on your level of sensitivity and or foot funk (I'm talking callus level here, people).

Fish tanks are cleaned regularly and have pumps and filters that clean the cages automatically. A special UV emission also sterilizes the water reducing the "ick" factor of what goes in must come out. Just try and not think about that part.

Sit back, relax and enjoy a cup of joe as you set out to go fishing for an order of backwards sushi.

Open to the public for its third season, Thrihnukagigur (Three Peak Crater) is the only place on earth where you can enter a magma chamber. It's like repelling from the top of the Statue of Liberty while she's on her tip toes, wearing heels. Yes, this is a thing.

A one hour bus ride through lava fields takes you to Reykjavik's closest ski resort where the tour suits up in neon adventure wear (giant water-proof parkas). A brisk, single-file hike is then led by a guide towards the crater along a marked path. There's a couple quick stops by the tour guide to point out lava formations and breath-catching for the hikers. Once everyone crosses the man-made, slinky metal ladders over the tectonic plates it's not far to base camp, which serves as the makeshift structure to the guides, operators and hikers. It's also the final bathroom stop along the trip before any awkward moments occur.

After some coffee and application of protective gear, groups are taken (four at a time, plus operator) and are lowered 400 feet inside the volcano. The open cable lift takes about seven minutes to descend into the 44 degree chamber of rainbow colored rocks. Wheels are placed along the outside of the giant window washing machine to adjust the cable lift as it maneuvers through the tight bottle neck opening. Groups spend about thirty minutes exploring amongst the brightly lit backgrounds of rubble with much of that time spent taking awesome selfies, der. Operation of this tour is from mid May - end of September. 

I'd describe the trip as earthy, submarine adventure porn. It has once in a lifetime trade marketing written all over it: Biggest well on earth! Mostly-inactive right now! Rolling deep! All Icelandic visitors wanting a thrill should shell out for this ride. It's bananas!

***Last erupted over 4,000 years ago. Cause it could. #InsideTheVolcano

Sleep? Who needs sleep? After arriving at our airbnb for a quick shower and a cappuccino we're off to one of the highlighted tours around Reykjavik: The Golden Circle Tour. It takes wary adventurers on a big bus through small streets to the Geysir geothermal area. It's about an hour's bus ride from our apartment in Reykjavik. The Strokkur geyser (the most active geyser in iceland) shoots sulfuric, bubbling water up into the air (about 100 feet) every 5ish minutes. It's a natural combo of James Taylor: fire and rain. Bring boots and rain gear but keep that extra pocket change at home.

Finally, The golden Circle tour ends with a stop at Thingvellir National Park. It's the divide where both the American and Eurasian tectonic plates are pulling apart at a rate of a few centimeters per year. Any of that spare pocket change should be kept for the pay toilet here. All that water does things to a body.

I'm off to Reykjavik on Monday. However, there's this little thing about a possible volcanic eruption. 

Orange is the newest aviation risk level (4th level of 5 level scale) in Iceland due to increased seismic activity in Bardarbunga. In 2010, most of Europe's airspace was shut down for six days due to ash from Iceland's Eyjafjallajokull's eruption. But this time around it's flooding that could become the issue since Bardarbunga is located beneath the ice cap of the Vatnajokull glacier. The area north of the Bardarbunga's volcano has been evacuated. The Vatnajokull National Park is about 180 miles from Reykjavik.  

The Iceland Meteorological Office has detected more than 3,000 minor earthquakes this week along the center's fault line. So, there's that too; practically a staycation in Los Angeles.